Connection

A Story: Part One

The client once told me, after our work together was complete, that our work had changed her “at a cellular level and thus her children”. As you can imagine, I was deeply moved. This exchange is one of the Nexus points that has had me thinking about impact.

I’ve thought about ‘Impact’ a lot in the last two years. I wonder how we impact people at work and in our personal lives, and how that impact might web out to other people.

In fact, I wonder if we are unaware of some of the most important moments, some of the most impactful things we have done, in our lives.

I wonder also about the seemingly small moments of impact.

Times I have been ‘helped’ or ‘not helped’... times I doubt the other person remembers:

Recently I was at the end of a very long jag during a car trip. I went into a grocery store to buy some food and also something premade for dinner. I was so tired that I misidentified someone dressed like my friend as my friend. Then, it was time to check out. The people helping me check out ignored my attempt to connect and, instead, conveyed their boredom and disinterest ...and packed my pre made dinner so carelessly it spilled. Was this earth shattering? No. What was interesting to me though was how small yet dispiriting this interchange was.

Instead of leaving this interaction with a small uplift, I felt my energy further drain and was frustrated (ok maybe a little distraught), way more than usual, to see part of my dinner at the bottom of the bag.

Another time, I was in a car accident as a very young woman. The older couple in the other car actively worked to convey to me that the accident was my fault. I was disoriented and outmatched until an older man and witness was suddenly at my side and gently stated, “It was your right of way. They came over the solid line of the offramp.” I then regrouped and pushed back. The man melted away, and I never had a chance to thank him, but I’ve always remembered his help.

A Story: Part Two

Another time, as a young woman and new driver (pre-GPS), I got lost trying to bring a family member with a bleeding head wound to the emergency room. I stopped at a gas station to ask for directions and a kind man got in his car so we could follow him to the emergency room. Again, I did not get a chance to express my gratitude.

These two small moments of Impact had a larger impact upon me. I was feeling disillusioned and trying to find my way as a young woman, and these times where older adults were actively helpful increased my trust in the world. It also role modeled for me how important small acts of kindness could be.

There are so many interchanges that have impacted me in small and large ways, negatively and positively. Some have altered the course of my life. Yet I doubt many of these interchanges are remembered by the other party.

We are interconnected and impact is happening moment to moment, and then webbing out to others. Are you noticing yours?